Every time we talk about love, we think about loving someone or something. A friend, fiancé, spouse, parents, books, a place, a dish, sunsets, sunrises and the list is endless. But how often is it that we think about loving our own selves? Is loving someone else easier than falling in love with yourself?
It is thought of that finding the right partner completes us, he/she fills that empty space in our hearts and rids us of our problems. But when we come to think of it, it’s the exact opposite. You yourself have to do all of that.
So what Does loving thyself mean? Is it about the looks or is it about Your nature?
To me, loving yourself means appreciating your capabilities, knowing your worth and accepting your flaws. It is to cater to our own needs and not wait for someone else to do that. It is to realize your strengths and weaknesses, chase your dreams and to forgive yourself for your mistakes and failures. For once. Make yourself a priority.
As Samantha Jones from SATC said- “I love you..But I love me more. I have been in a relationship with myself for 49 years and that’s the one I need to work one.”
Here’s a list of ways that might make you fall in love with yourself.
Working out: Yes! You heard it right. Personally, I have never been comfortable in my body. I have always been on the heavier side (thanks to the hormones and genetics). I would always want to wear clothes from all the aisles in the mall. But more than half of the times, they didn’t fit me. I have been through the worst phase of PCOD too (it just added on to all of that). Working out is not just about burning calories, it is about investing time in yourself. Work on yourself, develop a healthy lifestyle, have healthy food. I mean, how can you not love yourself when you are taking such good care of “U”.
Look back on your achievements: Take out your old certificates and trophies and remind yourself of what you are capable of. It will give you that feeling, no one or nothing else can.
Maintain a diary/journal: Its like talking to yourself. Everyday write something nice about yourself. One positive character in you. Note down your daily achievements. It might be as Simple as completing your to do list. But that will definitely make you pat your back and feel proud of yourself.
No comparison: Never compare yourself to others. Every one faces a different set of challenges. And so different failures and successes. Never think of yourself to be less than the other person.
Self trust: This is very very important. We all dislike people who lie to us or let us down. But knowingly or unknowingly, we often do that to ourselves. Trust yourself, trust your judgement, your decision, trust yourself that you can sail through this difficult time. Remind yourself of times you have done that in the past. Be true to yourself.
Pamper yourself: Go to the spa, go shopping. Dress up, put some makeup on and take yourself for a movie/ dinner date. If you look good to yourself, you are more likely to fall in love with “U”. It is absolutely OK to splurge and indulge in yourself once in a while. This is a great way to show yourself some love. Something you will be glad about later. I had this friend who used to go the mall, try on some clothes in the trial room, take pictures and feel happy. Sometimes you just need to step out, get some fresh air, clear your head and remind yourself of who you are and what you wanna be.
Hobbies: Work on things you like to do. This is a great way to spend some quality ‘me’ time and concentrate on yourself. When you do something you love, you will definitely love the person doing it.
Surround yourself with positive people: Declutter. Just remove all the negativity from your life. People, things, unwanted stuff. Be with people who uplift you, who know you for the good in you. People who have been with you through your past achievements, and who can remind you about your capabilities and capacities. These people are your mirrors. Look at yourself through their eyes.
Improvement: Work on things you have wanted to improve. Like losing weight, getting fit, drinking more water in a day, eat healthy, not losing your temper, saying yes to everything and everyone, planning your day. It might be anything, depends from person to person. Remind yourself of the end result and how it is going to make you a better person.
Do a noble cause: Doing something for the society like a charity or blood donation will Definitely give you a feel good feeling about yourself.
Me time: go on a solo trip, sit back and relax with that cuppa, read a book.
Let go of the past: The more you hold on to it, the more you poison yourself.
Be adventurous: Do things out of your comfort zone, something you have never tried before or never even thought of. You will get to know yourself more. And it definitely will be positive.
Loving yourself is very important for a happy you. And a happy you is mandatory for building happy relationships and a happier life. You deserve the kind of love you would give to someone else.
“To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong relationship”- Oscar Wilde